sweet memories

Sunday, May 31, 23.01PM, rewinding my life exactly 2 years and 4 hours early, i became an uncle!!! haha...it wasnt that i didnt wanted to be an old man at the age of 19, but ....
2 years ago the same day, was filled with joys, hope, blessings and prayers. I still remember doing a fast shopping at Splash just for inviting the special angel to our family. And then, rushing onn with time, reaching the hospital in Ajman, and broooooo.....its a baby gIRL :)

days passed on, months flew fast and 2 yrs down the line, shreya, has become quite naughty, healthy and funny..i hate kids but not all kids :P

may i never have may again

27.05.2009 - Almost we are coming to an end of this month, 5 months of 2009 is history now and i havent done anything worthwhile so far. I only have cried and pretended myself to be happy at few times. Or probably, i was actually happy at some time.
"Truth is always bitter" - truth and lies plays major roles in evryones life's. Some live a life of lies while some neutral and some just truth. But i dont believe that all of us live a life of truth. To hide a truth, we need to lie to ourselves, a lie that can destroy your character, a lie that can throw sand on others. I am too living in a lie world-a world that i would never disclose to any human.
Switching topic, this month was full of celebrations. May 14th was ma rents 27th wedding anniversary, May 21 was dad's birthday, May 25 was my best mans 6yrs of love anniversary and finally coming up is may 31st, my niece 2nd birthday!!!!
bdw...i love my niece, she is a bit shyful these days but very naughty and a killer!!! :P
I feel guilty about not able to help my best man when he needs it. Actually, even i am cut short of money, i just have 50dhs and i can share that money with him but it would be enough. Just keeping my fingers crossed to get my pay this week!!!
This month, i had many expenses. Took a loan from dad of AED 760, loan from ma buddy of AED 100, i have to pay the car washer Aed 150. So almost my pay goes for paying off these expenses. Also, about my car, i need to get a thing fixed up, so another expense on the way!!!!
Life is a part of ups and downs, we need to face them, right??

Keeping fingers crossed

Shiran
10.27 AM

maybe i was wrong...

May 18, 9.55AM

My day had to start off bad. My car has a break down again and i had to wait for a taxi to reach office. though i reached office on time, i feel bad about having a car. I remeber those days, when i had my driving license but wasnt lucky to have a car. Probably, i had fought so much with my parents to get a car for me. Or problably, i wasnt worthy of having it and bought a car when i was supposed not to drive.
My car, honda civic, has always been unlucky for me. It has spoilt a good friendship with my hommie, "Mr.B"; created tension for mum, fights with family and many more. Having a car was more like a dream, a prestige issue. i wanted to have a car of my own so that the security guy at the college will raise his hands n greet me each time i get out and in of the college, it must be boosting my ego.
I accept the fact that i am built of 90% ego and this ego won't let off me soon. I have had many bad experience in life and this could be the reason for my attitude. I may change, i may try to become an extrovert but...
life has played a game for me. my introvert nature forces me not to make more than 1 close friend and this friend always has to leave me n go away when i am in need.
Last night, i gave a second thought about my relationships with people and most of them seem to be decisive; or it can be the way that i think about them which they might not be or else i can read and understand peoples mind and i would always like to stay away from this wicked world.
I been thinking about my old best buddy, Mr.S a lot these days. i still remember the first time i met him, in grade 8th, i hated him coz he was INDIAN!!! lol....its not that i hate indians, but this guy was exported frm india and he had that indian attitude and i hated that. But later, he changed, we kept rolling as classmates, friends and then there was a moment when both of us unintentionally went wrong and this led to our breakup. But mistakes will always be forgivem, right? and so he was back to me in grade 12th n we became thick friends from then. He shared all hsi issues with me and was being a good listener. And later, as my curse still goes on, he had to leave off to India for higher studies. We also lost contact but whenevr he was back to sharjah, he would buzz me and we would meet up atleast one day. But when he had left me solitared, i had made up my mind for not to make any people close to my life. A year passed by and yes, i just remained myself, a closed book, didnt give any chance of letting people come into my life. As i said, life always had played a game with me, and i had to make some1 close to me again.

I am just feeling a bit nostalogic about my friends and hommies; maybe i miss them and i dunt want to loose them.

Bdw...i want to write a list of memories, probably, for my next blog.

Tacke care.

Shie

days are moving very fast

16th may...16days now i wrote a blog.
so far my days were going just okay. loads of random thoughts.missing my old friends.memories of my old best hommie can never be forgotten.wish he was with me now at this moment of my life. sometimes, i miss him.
these 2 weeks were creating memories.met an old friend of college, monica. We went to world trade center for an exhibition called ATM. it was boring but we were happy to meet again. we had dinner together at 2 places on the same day!!!
It was my parents wedding anniversary, 27 years long thick durable one. i gifted mum a pearl with diamond earing and for dad a sapphire watch. I gifted it to them on their special day but never felt like it was special. many family issues.
y dont ppl just deal about their own lives??
nyways, to compensate that, we went to the temple on friday and i took my rents to dubai mall, one of the largest mall in the world. we also went for lunch. the food was good n filling as it was buffet. And on the same day, i met up with my 2 old school hommies, hameed and shaggy!!! we met at 3 for a movie, Angels and Demons. it was kinda OKAY muvie, i was sleepy too after having the huge lunch. The movie got over at 5 and then v headed to meet other friends. we met lionel, damn, he has changed so much!!! And then we went to ajman coz the guys wanted to have sheesha....:P
we then headed to burger king, the guys hogged steak burger...n thet started crying coz the taste of burger made them weep....these guys r funnily weird....i njoyed my time with them.

And today, 16th may, i lay clueless in my bed. Ma niece is making noise and showing off her screaming skills. Mum is bz on the fone with her bestie. And dad is bhind the servant askin him to clean up the place.!!!

i am kinda bored today. i want a change in my life. there is something that i feel is missing in my life. i need to find it out someday.

myself...

some times i wonder why do people come to ones life and then leave u alone so forever. why is it that they cant stick on with ya?? why do they loose contact once they r away from ya?? why does evrything that went so smooth dusnt happen anymore?? is it that relationships are meant to be that way? or is it that relationship shudnt have been alive? or is it with the people themselve who always lookout for changes??

i can nevr understand this concept coz i been going through this my whole life; trying to find an answer to who could be that One-n-Only who will stay with me forever...no..no..i am not looking/hunting for a life partner...but for me the most precious are those people whom i can respect and be a follower.

today, was a pretty bad day from the start. office/xam/college all boring.i think i was the reason who made things boring. people around me were so lively.

i wish i could wear a mask of happiness always and socialise with people pretending nothing is wrong. Probably nothing was wrong, but something should be wrong.

A world a fantasy can i never be out from..a dream of being a superhero..dreams will be dreams.always!!

a new day, a new month, time is running!!

May 01, 2009
Woow...a new day begun, a new month, its the 5th month of 2009...time is running of so fast and i have no idea where it will take me in 2010. The past 4 months was filled with happiness, moments, surprises, sadness, shock, loved, special and lonely.

my current mood is norMAL...hehe..i feel normal...woke up early *8.30* and was left alone coz my rents went shopping. I did wanted to stay alone for some time and relax..had a great shower disturbing my neighbors with my most melodious voice signing ragas...lol

i did take some snaps and for the first time i felt posing for pics is so hard and to lead a model's life wud be so hard...but that doesnt mean i wont work it out.

ppl can dream..and so i am dreaming to make it big one day in fashion industry with my popping tummy, man-holed face, wormy hair and ant eyes..but sometimes i feel ia m the BEST!!

yesterday, my sis celebrated her 4th wedding anniversary...congrats to the couples...they are still working on their relationship...frankly its so not possible by me coz i am never blessed to have some1 i love the most for not more than a year..so i have lost hope in building a long term relationship and thats one defect in me. when i loose that special some1 it just tears me apart. wish i can take a magic journey. a journey to the universe :)

sometimes i can also be a bomb shell...and i feel so dry..i wanna pamper myself.

i am not sure what all are waiting for me this month, but lets just hope for the best.

I need a change soon...a CHANGE!!!